I’m filled with righteous indignation right now. I saw some foolishness come across my timeline yesterday and now I’m 38 hot about it. So apparently online “Christian” dating has taken it to a whole ‘nother level. Enter christianswingers.com. And no, this isn’t a new dance. Folks done gone crazy out here in these streets. The site encourages visitors to hookup with Christian swingers in their area. And I quote:
Browse and Meet Local Christian Swingers Who Believe That an Open & Honest Relationship With Each Other Will Keep Any Marriage Fresh and Exciting
For Christian Swingers things are not easy – often other religious people judge you, out of ignorance or envy, telling you that your lifestyle and love practices are wrong. But the Bible teaches us ‘Judge not lest ye be judged’ and there’s that verse about the first stone…
Open and Honest
So let’s see. The implication here is that an open and honest relationship is one where couple lets one another know that having someone else enter their relationship will be beneficial for their relationship. The devil is a dog gone lie.
First of all, the term Christian Swinger is what could be dubbed an oxymoron. That’s like saying a Christian Twerkers (oh, never mind…that actually happened) or a Christian Atheist. The terms are mutually exclusives. Married, covenant Christians, true Christians, don’t swing, they forsake all others. Those are the marriage vows, right? You know what’s crazy? Someone decided to come up with the bright idea for a reason. There’s a market for it. “Christian” swingers exist. Lord help us.
Fresh and Exciting
The site also boasts that swinging keeps your marriage fresh and exciting. We’ve all heard the rumors about Will and Jada being in an open relationship. Not saying they are Christian, but when it was the hot topic of the day, a lot of folks were happy that they were keeping their relationship fresh and exciting.
Danger: about to enter some mature territory for a second.
Look, I’ve only been married for four years, but my idea of keeping my relationship fresh and exciting is not inviting some other dude or broad into our intimate space. I love my wife’s…well, everything. Fresh and exciting isn’t hard when you are intentional about satisfying your significant other and they reciprocate. What’s wrong with people?
So yeah, I want to swing on people who call themselves Christian Swingers. I’m talking Boyz in the Hood Trey after Ricky got shot swing on. Pre-jail, first round bell Mike Tyson swing on. On the spot. No questions asked. Cause the idea is just foolish. It’s an affront to the faith others hold so dear to them. And of course most of the commentary will be about the hypocrisy of Christians who frequent the site. I want to propose that they aren’t Jesus followers at all. Confessing Him is one thing. Living a lifestyle that reflects that reality is another. And it’s quite fitting that the couple on the home page has their faces clouded out. Even if it is clip art, it reflects the reality of what the site stands for. An attempt to blur the line of a covenantal, Christian relationship–marriage. As a happily married man, I am appalled. Now if can only remember that code for Mike Tyson’s Punchout.
Question: What do y’all think about this new website?